


Better still, be my winding wheel

by etherealjimin



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Angst, Character Death, M/M, a lil bit of Liam and Ed, its my first fic be kind pls, its not a fic its just a short thing i did, louis is more than sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-16
Updated: 2014-01-16
Packaged: 2018-01-08 22:59:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 407
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1138455
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/etherealjimin/pseuds/etherealjimin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Louis finds himself searching for Harry's warmth everywhere, but he knows he's gone.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Better still, be my winding wheel

Dear Harry,

Liam took me paintballing today, but he wasn’t as good as he used to be. Neither was I. Everything just feels out of place, _wrong_ , so wrong without you. I waited at our corner for you to come crashing through the door and attacking me with your hand-made pranks, but you never came. Why didn't you? I didn't know I was crying until Ed found me and started crying too. I’ve only seen Ed cry _twice_ , Harry. I keep doing that these days, not noticing that I was crying until someone found me and asked me what was wrong. It's a stupid question, really. What could be right when the light of your life was gone?

I’m still seated on our sofa, on your spot. Still smells of you, after all this while, and that calms me down. It makes me feel as though you could come back, you know. I know there’s something wrong with me, Liam told me I have been wearing your clothes ever since you left. Funny how I myself didn't notice, yeah? I’m happy when you’re around me, now the best thing I’ve got are your clothes. Liam tells me I need a doctor, and we both know very well that you have been and always will be the only one who can fix me. It feels like yesterday when I knocked into you in the bathroom, you in your grey beanie, long limbs and goofy grins. You are the best thing that's ever happened to me, H.

Each time I close my eyes, I would see you and feel you smiling at me. I know it’s dreaming, but it's the only thing keeping me alive. You still look as beautiful as ever, distant and soft, but you weren’t mine to hold anymore. It’s a theatre screen behind my eyelids, you, glowing and painfully untouchable. But I can still see you, and I guess that's the best you can give me. I’ll take it. I’ll take anything you give.

I know Liam and Ed will be devastated, but they will understand, wouldn’t they? They always have understood how much I miss you, everything about you, they understand how much I need to be with you. I’m going to go the way you did, Harry. This is the last letter I can write to you, but I’ll be seeing you soon, love. I love you, more than you know.

L xx

**Author's Note:**

> um that was really short i also have no idea what i just wrote


End file.
